Challenge #152, #153

Challenge #152, June 1, 2011: Sorry!

I’ve got a lot to say today—too much, really, to put into words. Everything is just swirling around, and doesn’t want to turn into letters on a page.That’s how it feels, at least. But I suppose I’ll give it a shot.

Long story, short: I bought a plane ticket to go home in August. Then I ran out of money and decided to change my ticket so I could go home a couple weeks early, in July. Then I found out I couldn’t change my ticket, and will be in Europe for two extra weeks with no money.

I got really upset about it—one of those huffy puffy moods. You always want what you can’t have, huh? And I just wanted to go home.  Going home in August means that I will have only two days at home before moving to Montana for school. I had it in my head that I would get at least a week at home—that I would have some time to hang out with my mom and my friends and my doggies. And after five months of constant unknown, I was very excited for some familiarity.

But after I recovered from my huffing and puffing (by going to an international performance of a Shakespeare play—a wonderful thing), I realized that I wasn’t so much upset about the fact that I wouldn’t be going home early. I was upset, mostly, about the fact that what I thought was going to happen was not going to happen. And I realized that there is no point in that. Things will work out exactly as they work out, because there is no other way that they could. And to waste time being upset because you’re not in control is futile and stupid—and hard. It is hard to not be upset when you cannot be in control. So that is the challenge for today.

Challenge #153, June 2, 2011: Control the things that you can control, but let go of the things that you cannot.

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About onechallengeaday

I am searching for nothing and absorbing everything. My eyes are open--I am wondering, I am wandering. I was made to run, to think, and to write. And that is what I plan to do.
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7 Responses to Challenge #152, #153

  1. Stef says:

    Holy buckets, this is so timely. I might have a LOT to share on this in a week or two. 🙂

    Hang in there hon; you’re almost home…

  2. One of my frequent stay strong tips: Know what you can control, own that, do what you can and put the rest behind you. Who knows you might meet the one true love of your life by being forced to stay away two more weeks; then again, you might miss another true love of your life by not being home two weeks sooner. So life goes. Stay strong.

    • Katherine, those are lovely words, and so true! I am a firm believer that wherever you are is exactly where you should be (because you can’t be anywhere else). And so I’ll assume that the universe knows what its doing, leaving me here for two more weeks. Plus I’m sure I can find something cool to do with that time 🙂 Thank you for the wonderful words!

  3. A Well Wisher says:

    hey…

    Can I just ask you something?? I mean…lemme share with you something personal..
    In my country, the education system is rather comprehensive.

    After passing tenth grade (actually, it’s called “tenth standard” over here), we’ll have a national level exam where we will compete against every other student who has finished tenth standard. (And trust me, my country is large and has an even larger population…so, I have completed with over a million students)
    After we pass the exam, we’ll have to move onto eleventh standard. Now, depending on the grades that we got for the tenth standard final exam, we’ll get to choose the subjects for higher education (eleventh standard).

    There are three streams for higher education in my school:
    1. Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics and Computer Science
    2. Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics and Biology
    3. Economics, Business Studies and Accountancy

    I really wanted to go for the Computer Science as the field is easy for me. But, I somehow landed in Biology. And I don’t want to study bio’. There’s simply so much to study and I don’t think I can handle it all. And besides, almost all the most studious people in the school are in Biology. To put it more correctly, I had screwed up my grades so bad that I ended up with the titans. Now not only do I have crap to study, I have tough competition too.

    Now, should I be sad over it??

    Thank You!

    P.S: Your post was excellent! Keep more of such beautiful posts coming!

    • Since being in a foreign country, I’ve talked a lot with people about the education systems in their countries, and I’ve come across this design many times. Students either pick or get picked for a field right after finishing high school–and then they are stuck with it.

      In relation to this post, my question is–Is there any way to change your field? If you can change it–then I would say, yes, be sad about it, and then do something to fix the sadness. A lot of people I know are unhappy in their major (what we call it in the US), but don’t want to change it because it will add on an extra year to their education. I think this is the dumbest reason not to change something that makes you unhappy. So you may have to spend a little extra time at university–that is absolutely nothing in exchange for a career that has the chance to bring you contentment for the rest of your life. If you are unhappy with Biology–try to find a way to change to Computer Science.

      To be honest, I bet that some way, somehow, you could get into Computer Science. But, if I am wrong, and there is no way for you to change it–then no, you should not be sad about it. There is no point in grieving over something that you can’t change. If this is the case, find some way to embrace it. I know it might be hard, but I think that we can train ourselves to find the good in things–even things that we hate. Just don’t give up on your studies…studying sucks, but studying something you don’t like is better than studying nothing at all.

      Sometimes it takes a bit of bravery to find happiness–you have to take risks and work hard. But I promise that if you have the option (or even the slight possibility) of changing your studies, you will not regret taking the risk.

      Good luck! 🙂

  4. Chris Howard says:

    I guess that is part of wearing life like a loose jacket sometimes. A huge part of having peace of mind as you go through life…thanks! And I really really really wish we could help you with this. You can’t imagine how much I would love to have you home for 2 weeks. Which Shakespeare play did you see? I would love to hear about it.

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